Going on a Bank Holiday

Who is the star of my team right now? No question that it’s Lacazette.

The 30-year-old is at the peak of his virtual prowess in my footballing world, and he is knocking the goals in for fun.

He’s been threatening a hat-trick in recent matches and he finally got one against Leicester, with the third goal a lovely finesse curler from 20 yards. I’m getting very good at these types of goals after lots of practice on the training pitch.

I still finish every FIFA20 session with 5-to-10 minutes of one-on-one shooting practice on the training pitch. I’ve properly educated my fingers and my muscle memory to get the timing and duration of my presses just right, and it is paying off. As can be seen in today’s Miscellany video at the end, where there are two of the exact goals that I practice scoring over and over on the training pitch.

Tip for new arrivals from PES: you cannot ‘bank’ your button-presses in FIFA as you do in PES. The most egregious example of ‘banking’ a button press in PES was in PES2017, the edition of piss-easy headed goals. They were easy because as soon as you pressed the crossing button you could press the Shoot button – when the ball had barely left the crosser’s foot and was still dozens of yards away – and the game would ‘bank’ the input for you and make your striker rise up and strike a perfect header nearly every time.

It’s one of the major things to unlearn after making the transition to FIFA. In most scenarios in PES, you can press the buttons to pass or shoot well in advance of the ball actually arriving at your feet or head and there will be a more or less coherent outcome most times.

In FIFA ‘banking’ is mostly not allowed. Defensive headers, I’ve noticed, can be ‘banked’ ahead of time while the ball is still high in the air, but I’m not aware of any other scenarios where mistimed button presses are not punished. This is clearly evident on the training pitch, where a properly timed button press as the ball gets to your lone player’s feet will result in shots that are as you intended, while ‘banked’ shots à la PES result in feeble, misdirected efforts, and quite right too.Lacazette lurking just behind the league’s top scorer. His goals and the goals of my other strikers – Barbosa and Deulofeu have 10 and 12 goasl respectively– are responsible for my lofty position in the league and the fact that I am seriously challenging for a Europa League spot with 8 matches left.Arsenal are the weakest of the top 6, although all of them are formidable oponents. I’ve won one and drawn one against Arsenal this season. I’m not sensing a Master League-style table scripting thing here but I do think if I keep winning and picking up draws where I would have lost last season, I could finish in that 6th spot, or even in 5th spot. Man United are within my sights too.

I’m out of both Cups, so the League is my only route into Europe this season. It would please the Board, as getting into the Europa this season was one of my set goals, and I’m not going to meet any of the others (keeping wages growth to 15% lol – it’s 50% right now and only going to get worse).

Today’s video is a compilation of moments, goals and howlers. Also featured is my latest attempt to score with a volley from a corner – ONE DAY…

Updated: 8th May 2020 — 12:08


  1. 27th December. Everton 0 – 1 Exeter.

    First win on the season. Boom!!

  2. Just beat Fulham. Villa up next.

  3. Massive win 2-1 against Man City. Brereton has been poor all season, but pops up with 2 crucial goals. One more win for safety.

    And yes, I have been playing all day, mega session.

  4. Lloyd – hope there’s no chance of you being sacked after all that Herculean effort!

  5. Terribly basic question, considering I’m well into season 4, but here goes. If I sell a player, are the proceeds immediately made available to me in my transfer budget? In other words, can I just use the money to go straight out and buy another player? I’m on FIFA 19 but I guess that this is something that wouldn’t have changed.

  6. rhymes – Most of the money will be allocated once the player leaves the club so if you sell between windows you need to wait until the window opens for the budget to be increased.

    I’m onto my 4th season, I won L2 in the first season, about 10th in L1 in the 2nd season and then won L1 the season after. I really enjoy the lower league clunky football but finally having capable players is a joy. Managed to make myself some new kits following the tutorial on YouTube, fairly straight forward for basic stuff but more complicated kits will take some practice.

    Regarding mods, I played around with the Paulv2k4 gameplay mod and it has some very good things going on, notably each shirt pull is a foul so more free kicks and crossing is better but I find it far too quick so sticking with the FIFER mod.

    I’m up to Legendary difficulty playing with the OS sliders designed for shorter halves. Playing with mostly semi-assisted settings and Tactical Defending. Tactical Defending this year is superb it is the one thing I like most about FIFA compared to PES. Overall, really enjoying the game and will play for a few more seasons yet.

  7. rhymes450 – I’ve noticed some funds going into my kitty, but by no means all. There’s a lot about CM I’m still getting to grips with and only beginning to understand, now nearly 3 full seasons in. I keep drawing the comparison to Football Manager-style depth but that’s what it is. Roughly 35% of the way between ML and FM.

    Cook – interesting news about the other Paul’s FIFA mod. I’m having too much of a good time with the game itself to want to delve into the modding myself now, but depending how the 2021 games pan out I might not bother now as it looks hellishly complicated and hours of patient testing that I just don’t have. The other Paul made a front end for Frosty that I need to check in on.

  8. Safe with a game to spare. Drew with Bournemouth. Got Vinagre and AWB coming in on free transfers to be first choice in the fullback positions.

  9. still looking good , all this FIFA action. over at the PES-side of things, an actual “fouls-mod” has been released. short version of the results: it works.
    have had a minimum of 4 fouls per game for the last 3 matches. superstar, master league. intriguing and it comes with a load of other improvements such as scripting being toned down a couple of notches.

    still got FIFA waiting in the wings, all modded up (Paul / NG: it really WAS very straightforward and easy to mod, what a joy compared to PES)

  10. Thanks for the info Cook and NG. I’m in the mid-season transfer window. Seems to work as you’ve both indicated. Sold a lesser player for around 10 million in this morning’s session and the board allocated around 8 million of that to the transfer budget. So I’ve decided to sell my best player (Belotti) to Real Madrid for 65 million. Provided they agree on personal terms, the aim in my next session is to buy a younger replacement of similar quality, maybe for a little less, thereby lowering the age of the squad and maybe making a few shillings to boot. Hope it works out or I’ll have really put my foot in it. I did try to cover my back and do it the other way round, i.e., buy a replacement first and then sell Belotti but I didn’t have the funds and couldn’t meet the asking prices. Interesting stuff though, whatever way it pans out.

  11. Season 5. World Class, 34 games played, 2 points separate the top 5 teams, title run-in is a bum clencher, also in the Champions League semi’s after beating Barcelona 3-1 on Aggr.

  12. #1 – that is interesting news indeed, but I am as fully committed now to my FIFA20 CM as I would be at an equivalent stage of an ML if somebody said ‘hey, FIFA’s got fouls now!’. One footy game at a time. I had a read of the forums on the patch – it’s the new effort from the user called Holland, yes? If so then he really was/is the best in the business, the most effective mods I used when I was on PES2020 were always by him. Still, having said that I’ll be interested to hear what your avg. fouls per match are after 30 matches, not just 3… Even on vanilla I could have the odd golden session of fouls.

    Paul – about to start my Season 3-ending session with the Europa a very real prospect. Exciting times.

    Lloyd – hope there’s no sacking at season’s end.

    rhymes450 – FIFA CM contracts and transfers are the toughest we’ve ever seen in a football game, IMO. Great stuff and really forces me to focus on my Youths. This could easily be a 20-season job. The latest wild rumours about the Coronacrisis are that the current state of affairs is basically our life for the next few years, which might well rule out any 2021 football games, so 20 seasons could be totally viable.

  13. NG – it is still sitting at an average of about 3 per game after about 10 matches now in total with the mod. the logic has been reworked and where there should be fouls, there are.much like FIFA’s logic behind it, the frequency is just a bit higher on PES (I think). however, nothing worth leaving FIFA over as there are a multitude of issues still very much present.
    And yes, it is from the modder called Holland, really good stuff from the guy as you say.

  14. NG – no sack

  15. PES could have 20 fouls per match and still wouldn’t be worth playing.
    It was a pile of crap when I was plahying it, now after months of the joys of FIFA and modded fIFA, that one little dabble into PES a few weeks back just showed how end harassing, amateur and laughable the game really is nowadays.

    If there’s anything that can be taken as a positive from this pandemic, there are 2 things, that Love Island has been cancelled and that there may not be a PES, the world is a better cleaner place without either.

  16. Just listening to drury on the conference. The man is very good, great at speaking as you’d expect but a very good script he has prepared as well. Clearly Konami give him guff to work with. He should jump ship, although FIFA has always felt ‘sky’ to me.

  17. Turf – you can cearly tell the Japanglish script was largely to blame for the nonsensical shite that comes out of PES commentary, we all know the likes of Beglin, Champipon, Drury et al are decent passionate commentators in their own right, but Konanmi’s piss poor understanding of the lore of football, and westernism, and just general language that makes sense, just turnes it all into a complete shambles.

    Well EA Sports are the official match day stats and presentation partners for Sky Sports, obviously chosen because of the tie-in with the official FIFA named game and because EA know how to do quality presentation.

  18. Drury reckons Amazon are going to blow the thing apart, the first real challenge to two broadcasters (sky and bt) who can’t afford to lose their main product.

  19. If Amazon’s showing of games over the xmas period was anything to go by he could be right.
    Great presentation, good ex players/pundits, nice graphics and analysis, I enjoyed their broadcast.

  20. Amazon have definitely got enough cash and at the end of all of the Corona stuff… they’ll probably have all the cash. Pro-tip: Amazon Prime Now are stealthily the go-to guys for same-day grocery deliveries. Nothing like having the garlic bulb you need for dinner ordered at 5pm and delivered at 9pm, just in time for dinner!

    I’ve always liked the main commentators’s voices themselves on PES, can’t think of a duff one, plenty of terrible co-commentators though – Mark Lawrenson stands out.

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