Daisycutter’s club

I’m firmly mid-table in Season 2 of PES2017, on Professional difficulty. After a brief rally that saw me nuzzling the outer edges of the top 6, I’m now 12 points off the top 6 with 10 matches left. That’s probably not enough time to haul myself into promotion contention. Even the most generous ML league table script would struggle to look away whistling while I hauled myself up from here:


I would pretend to be all ashamed and embarrassed about being mired in Division 2 on Professional – but pretending is all it’d be. I’m having much too good a time to be bovvered, really, about not measuring up to some notional yardstick of performance that I don’t subscribe to anyway.

Master League players do not compete with each other. I also don’t think they play to ‘beat the game’. They’re in it for the self-contained experience – for the journey, if I may say so. Nobody walks the road with you. The whole point of walking this road is that there’s nobody else there to spoil the fun. It’s just something for you, and you alone, and that is its glory.

It’s time to talk about long-rangers in PES2017 – or their absence, by and large.

Since day 1 of PES2017, I have scored two goals that could be classed as long-rangers. There was this one by Hettich, which earned him the accolade of My Favourite Player, until I sold him not long after.

I don’t regard that goal as a true long-ranger, on account of its placement in the net. The kind of long-ranger I am talking about is struck from 30-40 yards and rockets into the postage stamp corner of the net, preferably cannoning off the underside of the bar or the side of the post. Or even, in the best cases, the underside of the bar and the side of the post. Netting a thundering, blasting shot from decent range is one of the principal joys of Pro Evo, and of life.

So far, I have yet to score one of these in PES2017.

This isn’t a moan. I’m not paranoid that there are no long-range goals in PES2017. I have seen examples. (So please don’t post any stray videos you’ve come across in forums. I’ve probably seen them already. Although I am interested in your own.)

The forums opine, based on scanty evidence as usual, that long-range shooting is reserved for the top-rated players. This makes no sense given the abundance of long-range goals throughout the lower divisions of ‘real life’, but it is just the kind of thing that PES Productions are capable of doing.

Long-range goals were too common in PES2016. I thought the balance was just right in PES2015 (the most underrated PES game since PES2009, or even arguably since PES4).

Maybe the keepers are the key in PES2017. They’re the best PES keepers we have ever seen, of that there’s no doubt.

Here’s the other quasi-long-ranger I mentioned. I scored this just yesterday. It’s an interesting one, as it’s a bit of a daisycutter that appears to fool an unsighted keeper from a diagonal distance of 25+ yards:


Updated: 21st October 2016 — 11:11


  1. NG – You’re quite right, but I always hold out hope for some form of learning AI in football games. It shouldn’t, in principle, be that hard to implement – and without “cheating”.

    I think the reason that I’ve always loved PES (and its predecessors) is that the top-level AI is never spiteful. There are always multiple ways to beat it; they don’t render entire tactical systems or playstyles obsolete in a misguided attempt to offer a challenge.

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