A Snooker snippet and a PES5 match

This summer’s glorious holiday season continues with another instalment.

Today, 30 seconds of me playing iSnooker (against myself) on the PC, and then a full match from my ultra-long-running Master League campaign on PES5, also of course on the PC.

NB: my recording software rendered PES5 just as God intended, in 4:3 aspect ratio. I have it stretched to 16:9 when playing ‘live’ and would have preferred it to record in that same format. It certainly has before.

I play PES5 for at least a couple of matches nearly every week โ€“ but still fall foul of the way the old game penalises the easy way we all squeeze buttons instead of actually defending.

And yes, I can hear that annoying crowd noise effect at the start. I only heard it when watching this recording back, though. I never play with the sound turned up on old football games. Podcasts and audiobooks are my background noise.

I’m not playing anything right now, really. I would love to have the energy to explore the PC version of PES2019 some more, or to pursue myClub some more, or to do likewise with FIFA19, but I haven’t got it (the energy).

So I am hopping from thing to thing, never alighting anywhere for very long. And enjoying myself doing so.

I believe this time next week the eSoccer PES 2020 Kickball demo will be either here, or imminent. At that point, normal service on this blog might be resumed. I usually only play the demos for a couple of sessions before abandoning them forever, but we’ll see.

Updated: 23rd July 2019 — 12:02


  1. I know you are just messing about in that iSnooker clip but the cue ball control was horrible. you didn’t set yourself up for the next shot in any of the shots you took.

    And i know this will be mocked upon by NG, blah blah but PES 5 looks horrible these days, jerky, stuttery running and movement, the pitch looks like it would be made of concrete and the ball a pea.

    Reminds me of one of those Neo Geo arcade machine games.

    Nice to see something different on the blog though in these lazy hazy summer days between games.

  2. Jaws is pretty terrible now. All those b-list and has-been actors. And all those tracking shots, so old fashioned! Not to mention the 35mm film. No, the Panavision C Series Anamorphic Lenses have not aged well. And that ending, my God, what an obviously fake shark. Give me Transformers VI anyday.

  3. NG – haha Apt you went with the fishy theme as I was hoping to reel in a big one!!!! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  4. Paul – that’s exactly what cricket 07 felt like on the ps2, arcadey, chunky and slightly bleeding at the edges overly colourful graphics. It’s part of the charm for me now. I think it would look awful in something that was trying to be great – gran turismo etc – but in just a game type game it’s fine.

  5. I know Turf, I totally get the charm of old games and their quirky Gfx and what not, its part of the appeal of playing them today, the nostalgia, I just wanted NG to bite at the PES 5 criticism, and he did, gonna need a disgorger!

  6. Scarface for another example. I mean, look at those washed-out colours, supposedly so atmospheric and evocative of the era. Just looks like an old movie to me. And then Al Pacino chewing the scenery, and all that blood is so fake. Give me a nice 2019 animated CGI-fest anyday.

  7. Old man needs his Complan with some Diazepam in it.

  8. Don’t even get me started on King Kong. Talk about a casual bundle of racial and gender-based tropes that should never be seen again. It was Adolf Hitler’s favourite movie, did you know that? Tells you everything you need to know. They should collect and destroy all the prints, and we should watch things that empower women like the new Godzilla movies, which people will definitely be talking about in 80 years’ time.

  9. Pure Pool on the PS4 is pretty decent, and was only a few quid when I picked it up earlier this year. Looks pretty, and has a snooker option.

    Simulated my way to the Premier League after 8 seasons of my sim ML in PES 2019. Wish that demo would hurry up.

  10. Yes, lets be fair Paul, it doesn’t really matter what pes5 looks like. A shit game is a shit game no matter how good the graphics. I believe the expression applicable here is ‘you can’t polish a (pes) turd’.

  11. Turf – No amount of Pledge will shine that monstrosity up.

    NG – An aside from the japes, just an interesting observation but my Online FIFA games are averaging 8-10 fouls every game.

  12. Finished 16th in season one of France Deux. 10/13/15 which I think is highly respectable and largely down to above average performances from vasilj, hettich, rice and castledine. My selling of arcas early doors went well but lobato has refused to sign a new contract and I now lose him for nothing. I will also lose my three loanees meaning I need a good summer of frees.

  13. Solid effort Turf, there should start to be some decent youth players coming through if I remember correctly. My own France Deux experience on 19 continues in season 7 although losing a bit of momentum with summer holidays and long evenings in the garden replanting my central bed. Hoping to get some silverware this season after losing cup final to PSG last

    PES5 AI looks even more tame than I remembered – old Jaric, Vasiljโ€™s predecessor, largely untroubled at DMF there

  14. I have made it into the England side on my career mode in Cricket 19. To reflect the extra difficulty of Test Cricket I have upped the AI difficulty to Veteran and increased the bowling and batting to hard. Glad I did as I have enjoyed the hard test I have endured so far. So far just bowled and started batting. I was quite pleased to get 2 wickets but went round the park a bit on a dusty Pakistan pitch that offered nothing for swing bowlers. Pakistan finished at 469 all out. I am currently 11 not out with England struggling at 45-3. Below is a nice little clip of me being awarded my first cap.

  15. Decent but not good enough to gain promotion, no one you’ve ever heard of, just the odd low 70 made up name and the youth team are always much more expensive than free 16yo equivalents. I’ve had to sign a loan striker as I couldn’t get anyone except regen Peter crouch and I’m just tired of using him in ml. Hettich wouldn’t sign, picked up a cb, cmf and a couple of players I hope will develop, one of them being a very low level diarra at dmf. Money isn’t the problem it’s availability. Next season my spine will remain woodman in goal, vasilj’ apprentice kalaica, rice, castledine and mbappe.

  16. n-G – PES5 looks glorious but slower on that PC set up of yours, compared to my PS2 version.

    Speaking of which, I’m back playing the best PES ever, shitty graphics and all, with my Brighton side starting an eighth ML season as defending champions. I had planned to take a break from footy games until the PES 2020 demo but these infernal hot nights lured me to the cool of the shed and temptation got the better of me.

    I only managed to bring in a new reserve keeper in the close season (no offers for even my listed players of course) so it’s pretty much the same team attempting to retain the title. A 2-1 defeat at Rangers in the opening game suggests it’s not going to be as straight forward as I thought.

  17. NG – You could always forget about new eISSPES football 2020 and just have a season of PES5 blogging?

    My cricket 19 BAL has started to flourish like a well timed cover drive, had my first 50 score yesterday when I realised not trying to hit every delivery for 4 is a good tactic, the satisfaction of a perfectly timed front foot block cannot be underestimated. Unlike PES, the cricket version of BAL sims all the bits when your player isn’t involved which is perfect for a game like cricket which does go on a bit. My batting average is now 15 and bowling is 40. Playing in Wilts and Glos club cricket has never been so fun. Darryl, how are you getting on?

  18. Cook – good to here you are enjoying the cricket equivelent of BAL. Yes it is ideal for cricket. I started of as a young 17 year old playing for Burnley and then progressed into the Lancashire team after 3 full seasons. I then played two full seasons at Lancashire before breaking into the England team. I am an all rounder in the mold of Freddie Flintoff. My bowling is slightly better than my batting. I am aggressive in both parts of the game but can get good control with my bowling. Last season I averaged about 40 with the bat and about 16 runs per wicket with the ball.If you go chasing after everything outside off stump you will end up knicking to wicketkeeper or slips. It is all about picking the right delivery to go after. Leaving the right ball is just as important as it builds confidence. I find this part of the game just as rewarding.

  19. NG – the goals still look so good on PES 5. Unmatched after all those years. AI seems tame but still willing to dribble and not mindlessly drone forward to goal (looking at you PES 19).

  20. I can only imagine Paul’s disgust at a sport where leaving a ball and doing nothing brings great pleasure…

    It really is a bit of mystery why you aren’t a cricket man NG. It meets all of what I have rather assumed about you based on the snooker, the pace/style of PES you prefer, the literary references, etc etc.

    Not going so well at Lords, who’d have thought Tim Murtagh would get the quickest 5for

  21. i cant be disgusted at Cricket because i don’t class it as a proper sport.

  22. Paul – You belong in Russia:-


    Personally though I would send you to the Gulag’s for statements like that. I do like the fact that the ‘Others’ don’t get cricket and what it is all about.

  23. Too cold there.
    Officially its a sport although id very much doubt its the ‘second most popular sport in the world’ – where did they get that from?

    Just not a ‘sport’ that holds any appeal whatsoever for me personally.

  24. Paul – I imagine it is based on global TV audiences and the game is so popular in Asia, where I suspect the majority of this comes from.

  25. Just come across a second season made up cmf player in 2017 called โ€˜Jon Ericeโ€™…the warning was there. Same short scuttling physique but not the booming shot.

  26. Uncle Turf โ€“ re. cricket and why I’m against it when I love the likes of slow snooker and chess et al… when you talk about the greatness of cricket, how often is it about a particularly great bowl, or bat, or catch? Okay, so Ian Botham was a great cricketer, or Viv Richards was โ€“ show me their highlights. Sporting highlights as a concept doesn’t quite translate when it comes to cricket. An O’Sullivan 147 or a Mark Hughes supervolley doesn’t seem to have an equivalent ‘wow’ in cricket. Sometimes it is about the spectacular moment with bat and ball (or catch), but more often it’s the fans’ love of the whimsicalities of the sport, the raconteurs in the commentary box during a rain delay, and so on. Snooker is a good parallel to draw. Even at the end of an hour-long Griffiths-Thorburn frame, 95% of the recollection of the game is about the shots and gameplay and drama of the story, with perhaps 5% the surrounding lore and the way the commentators said this or that. Cricket seems to be 25% about the actual game and 75% about the whole ‘let’s groove on the cult of cricket’ feeling. I’m a veteran of dozens of long arguments about it all over the years and this is my sincerely held non-snarky view.

    Cricket is the Dwarf Fortress of sports. You’ll remember that Dwarf Fortress isn’t a hard game, as such, just a bizarre user interface. To get to the game, you have to get past the guard towers. Cricket is much like that. To get to the nougaty centre you have to appreciate the outer casing, and I just don’t.

  27. Highlights of Botham and Richards? Really? of all the cricketers you could have picked I wouldn’t have suggested them. If you’d said how much of the highlights represents the entire game then yes, 5×45 min episodes in 40+ hours of play, but Beefy and Master Blaster?! You Tube is awash with their exploits.

    I’m now playing one game of Tetris a night, mainly because it can take a long time and is really draining. I don’t know that I’ve played anything that overloads you as much as this – the combination of the Tetris Effect with the music and visuals is enough on a screen, in VR I can see why some people have reported bursting into tears at the finish.

  28. Took the day off yesterday and sat by the lake in the 38 degree sun, and had a few beers and some lunch, most pleasant day it was, had a few more online divisions matches later afternoon/evening just to escape the heat, won the division 7 title, promoted to Div 6, won my first 2 matches in Div 6 too, on a hot streak.

    I seem to be coming against Liverpool every other game, people are using them because of their fast front 3 and the updated stats boost of winning the UCL.
    I have their style nailed though and beat them every time.

    Still amuses me how dickish people are, when they concede a goal just leaving it the maximum allowed time before kicking off again, then pausing the game repeatedly and letting the 35 secs timer run down every time, surely this must get as boring for them as it does for me?

  29. Uncle Turf โ€“ my point was that nothing of Botham’s and Richards’ play has made it into the stored collective memory of the non-cricket-loving world. Not in the way that e.g. Maradona’s second goal vs England in 1986 has survived (or even the first). I remember Brian Lara breaking some record once, but I don’t remember a single frame of him swinging a bat, ever. Why is that?

    Take almost any sport in which I have no interest and I remember concrete scenes. I can close my eyes and see Rebecca Adlington touching home in the swimming, and Steve Redgrave hanging exhausted over his oar things in that boat thing, and Johnny Wilkinson doing his weird psych-up thing before a kick in the rugby, and Ivan Lendl whacking the Wimbledon turf with his racket and spitting at it, and Nigel Mansell steering down the home strait, and even somebody called Sean Curley hitting a goal in field hockey in some Olympics โ€“ and I could go on in this vein for a hell of a long time, covering just about every sport there is โ€“ but there is not a single standout image in the collective unconscious of any cricketing action. That’s why cricket is a lesser sport IMO. Its action just doesn’t rise. It’s a sport that seems to be all about other things โ€“ trees and commentary anecdotes and tea breaks and whimsicality.

  30. Paul โ€“ the thing that always interests me about the pausers and spoilers in online gaming is, what do they get out of it? ‘To annoy you’ surely isn’t all of it, because as you point out, they’re having to sit through the pause as well.

    As for the weather, hopefully that’s it for summer. Seeing the news footage of the beaches looks like the most appalling places on earth. I’d be happy to press a button and go straight to September now.

  31. NG – I’m with you on the Cricket, I guess with the exception of the recent ‘Super Over’ WC gifted win, there is never any excitement or drama in the sport, which is why it doesn’t get my interest.

    As for the onliners, to concede a goal, then pause the game for 35 secs without making any subs or tactical changes, return to the game, then immediately pause it again for another 35 secs, then return to the game, and stand and wait and do nothing for 10-15 secs just to delay kick off, what exactly do they get out of it?

    Enjoyment from annoying the other player? Not really as I just queue a pause and go and grab a drink or something when they do that so they are sitting through longer ‘dead time’ than I am, and I’m still winning the match.

    Pretty much sums up the behaviour and mindset of people and society in this day and age. *relative to the age group that predominantly play online.

  32. Seriously NG? I think you are way off the mark with your representation of the British public conscious. Olympic events do tend to get more viewing and stick in the mind but ‘Botham’s Ashes’ is one of the most famous sporting events ever. The 2005 Ashes was a landmark moment. (Paul was obviously out on repeated occasions – particularly the Kasprowicz off the glove wicket that shouldn’t have counted to win the test). The Flintoff-Lee handshake? McGrath standing on a ball. Ponting’s cheek being cut. Gary Pratt. It’s endless…By contrast I have no recall at all of Lendl (McEnroe yes, Murray crying/winning, certainly not Sampras, et al) and Rebecca Adlington?! – I know she won but I couldn’t even tell you what stroke she did.

    I’m genuinely interested to know if I’m alone in this.

  33. Today’s post is incoming, should be up before 1pm. I put the PS4 on for a quick match this morning and ended up playing for ages.

    Uncle Turf โ€“ I don’t remember a single one of the cricket famous moments you reference. Botham’s Ashes isn’t a ringing phrase. Contrast this with almost any football-hating 40-something who could still describe Maradona’s Hand of God, for example, or know who Bobby Moore was, or remember when Gary Lineker was a player, etc

    Stokes’ freak 6 in the recent World Cup final was a great moment that I will remember, granted โ€“ but where are all the others in my almost 50 years of life? In all the decades of TV and news-watching and soaking up the general culture, not one moment of Botham/Richards/Lara actually playing the game do I remember. But I would recognise the voice of Brian Johnston and the manner of his and his co-commentators’ raconteurship, in an instant, despite never having gone out of my way to listen. And that’s my ultimate critique of cricket as a sport: its wider cultural presence is more about the non-sport aspects of the sport, than the sport.

  34. Turf – You are not alone as you say there are many standout moments on that series. As well as all that there was the queing outside Old Trafford at 7.30am and the last bowl drama of that test. We also had the bowling exploits of Mcgrath and Warne, before the former trod on the ball. I could go on and on but there was drama all the way through that series. As for the Botham series it helped that they used to play the highlights whenever there was rain in a test match. I suppose that is the point as cricket fans we were brought up on all these highlights but as a none cricket fan, you would hardly be staying tuned in a rain delayed game. I am fully with you on this one though.

  35. Haha Turf/Darryl – 80% of all the ‘highlights’ you are mentioning are not even highlights from the actual game being played itself, they are whimsical events, such as the queuing, treading on a ball, flintoffs handshake…….

    Kinda proves NG’s point.

    And if queuing outside a ground is classed as a Cricket ‘highlight’ then well ………..

  36. Exactly, there’s very little scope in the mechanics of cricket for ‘that was such a Botham swing’ to become a thing in the way a ‘Mark Hughes volley’ was a thing.

  37. You two are far too far down the rabbit hole to bother chasing. If for nothing else you will be hoisted on your petard of ‘Botham’s Ashes isn’t a ringing phrase’. Maybe at two desks in Coventry and Milton Keynes where sport isn’t really followed.

    We haven’t even mentioned Bodyline…

  38. This is why Paul was correct when he said cricket wasn’t a sport. He is right as it is so much more than a sport and exists on a higher level than that. It is the whole package as yes it does have its whimsical backdrop and events but with cricket you also have those special moments that make watching 5 days of cricket worth it. I also had the pleasure of being at day one of the 2005 Ashes Test match. I have watched numerous sporting events live but none have come anywhere near to just being there. Still send a shiver….

  39. I should have said at Old Trafford.

  40. My best mate at school was a huge cricket fan and always explained it in just those terms Darryl โ€“ it’s unique among sports in that it’s as much (or more) about the surrounding culture of it, than the nuts and bolts of it. I think baseball comes close to having the same nature, but even there a two-hour baseball game is a self-contained unit that you can watch and enjoy on its own.

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