Trophy, trophy, trophy!

It was a rocky road to the Europa League final. I needed a scrappy late late winner vs Napoli to win the quarter final. I got a helping hand from the AI own-goal of the season to win the semi-final.

Then it was here. The final, versus Fulham.

Find a player that looks at your digital avatar the way Castledine is looking at mine here. (Or looking at the back of my neck anyway.)

So. Season 14. No proper trophy in the entirety of PES2019 so far.

Below is a 3-minute highlights package. A couple of issues to mention. First, wanting to make my edit easier, I chose to manually record a highlight each time one happened, and somehow managed to miss capturing most of my second goal. Second, whilst editing I made an unfortunate 1am decision to provide a voiceover when I was a) already a bit hoarse from a long working day, and b) using the laptop microphone. Sound quality is not great.

With all that said, it was quite an interesting match.


That is all I have to say.Yes.Fulham had the best chances and dominated the match. They had 8 shots, 4 on target. I had 6 shots, 3 on target. Possession was 49/51 to me. The 2019 version of ‘the AI that we need’ was much in evidence in this match.

I’m sore that I managed to miss recording my second goal. I was so thrilled to go 2-0 up that I forgot to double-tap the Share button to capture the previous minute, and only just remembered with seconds left to capture the brief view that did make it. At least it was a standard sort of goal from Mascherano rather than a 50-yard long-ranger.

The Premier League season ended like this:Mediocre in every respect. A true transitional season.

The above table will interest all students of Master League table scripting. The script left the top-4 door ajar for me for as long as possible. At the end I was only 4 points off it. And I was only 2 points from the top 6. Every good, bad and indifferent result I had was matched by the exact result(s) above me that were needed to keep interest alive. Despite losing 14 (FOURTEEN) matches I was in the running for a podium finish right to the end.

One good thing: I’m still going to be in the Champions League next season, thanks to New Big Ears.

Now I must aim for the league title. And the Champions League. Also the FA Cup while I’m at it.

I’ll finish with a sight that I waited 14 seasons to see:

Updated: 17th May 2019 — 11:37


  1. Congrats on winning the Europa League, an actual trophy, and one that has eluded you for so many years in PES, must bring a satisfying sense of closure to things in that regard.

    I can’t help but laugh at the incident from 57 secs, after you score your first goal, Fulham attack, you blatantly slide and foul their winger, nothing is given, the ball goes out for a corner, yet the ref books your player!?

    It was as blatant a foul as you’ll ever see but wasn’t given, if the ref played advantage then when the ball went out, he should have immediately pulled it back and gave Fulham the free kick. You can’t give a yellow for the foul and not give the foul
    Again, basics. Attention to the core rules and detail.

  2. Congratulations NG. No problem with the voice over, but calling it pez and not Pro Evo made me shudder. ITS PRO EVO!!! 😉

  3. Lloyd – I do call it Pro Evo to myself and others in the vicinity, but occasionally say ‘PEZZ’ as here. It seemed more natural to say that on a late-night voiceover.

    Paul – of course, you’ve been away a long time. There’s also the one where the ref plays advantage and you know your player is getting booked, but you also know that if you recover the ball and keep it for long enough without a stoppage the ref will ‘forget’ and you’ll get away with it. That’s been a nuPES staple from PES2014 on.

  4. NG – there’s nothing natural about the word pez. Sounds like a Middle Eastern starter.

  5. Vegetarian?

  6. Congrats NG. From previous posts, I get the impression that the Europa League is maybe the most satisfying competition that you (personally) could win, so well done. It’s a ginormous trophy for a game that shuns the implementation of trophies. It probably doesn’t feature in Paul’s copy of the game 🙂

  7. rhymes450 — from my CL final appearances I think the generic Big Cup trophy on show here is the same as the one they now have for the CL, so there’s plenty of Paul Rage material left in PES2019.

    Lloyd — as far as I know, this and one previous voiceover thing I did a few years ago, are the only occasions when I have said ‘PEZZ’ out loud. In general conversation at work with the one lad who pretends to remember PEZZ exists, and when I’m booking my annual week off, it’s always ‘Pro Evo’. As the Inbetweeners would say it.

  8. Really wouldn’t fuss me if the trophy for the Europa league wasn’t the correct one or even anything like it, just the fact that there is an actual physical trophy that you see your players parading around with is something.

    As I’ve said many many times much to NG’s aggravation, slogging it out over a 40 game and more season, taking hours, days, weeks of your life, with the sole aim being to win a trophy, only to do so to find that the developers are so lazy, half assed, and ignorant to detail that there actually isn’t a trophy, just a blank space, is, for me personally, in terms of reward, satisfaction, immersion, completely unacceptable.

    NG’s video looked great, and the screen grabs, of the trophy being lofted around, if there isn’t a trophy that victory parade is instantly downgraded and just resembles nothing more than an end of season lap of honour.

    over and over and over again, year after year after year, and nothing ever changes ……. get the basics right and attention to detail.

  9. Paul – I agree that it is simply lazy/ridiculous not to stick something in there but personally it’s a minor annoyance that has a miniscule impact on the satisfaction of winning a competition (I almost typed trophy ha!)

    NG – congrats on your Europa League title, I’ve taken over at Burnley for season two, they finished 16th and are in need of a whole squad overhaul… Perfect

  10. Pete, for some it may only be a minor annoyance, but for me its like NHL with no Stanley Cup, Madden with no Superbowl, or the end scene from Uncharted 4 being missing and a black screen with text saying ‘game finished’.
    Either way, its just lazy, and shows the lack of motivation towards the offline game.

    They release DP’s with boots, faces, kits all the time, if Neymar gets a new shade of green on a tattoo Konami clamber over themselves to update it in game, yet for years they haven’t even bothered putting something in that is the complete sole aim of the game to win.

  11. NG – Well done as I know how much you wanted to win that piece of silverware.

  12. Congratulations. Great effort as I know it’s not often something you can even qualify to compete for. Your mediocrity at the top four battle paid dividends!! Mind it’s the most shit photoshopped looking generic jug you’ve ever seen.

    Completely off topic – anyone familiar with Slack? Or competitors on that theme?

  13. Paul — oh, totally agree, having that big generic Big Cup in the mix at the end there made a whole lot of difference. The cherry on the cake. Inserting a generic cup into such scenes is such a straightforward thing to do that I’m also amazed it’s not a nuPES staple.

    Pete — a Burnley Unknowns challenge maybe? The good thing about PES2019 is that whichever route you choose — established star names or green youngsters — the challenge will hold up. I remember you being a 1337 gamer type so maybe not as much of a challenge as it’s proving for me — but believe me I’m not unhappy about being average.

    Darryl/Uncle Turf — that’s exactly it, the Europa League (and all its equivalents)_has been my white whale for so long in PES. I normally only get one or two tilts at it per PES. Very satisfying. My aim in PES2019 now, as a clearly average footy gamer, is to win them all.

    I just DuckDuckGo’d this ‘Slack’ and no, not my field at all. Skype is used at my workplace to say the occasional lol across the office. In fact, I’d say ‘must be familiar with Slack’ is a counter-indicator for job suitability with me.

  14. Wow, I haven’t heard mention of DuckDuckGo for a while. Has anyone else tried the Vivaldi browser? As for Slack it always seemed to be trying to do too many things to me.

  15. Yes we use Skype at work but don’t like how it encourages the use of smileys. I may be old fashioned but think they are not for the workplace.

  16. I always assumed Skype was for phoning granny in Australia or a conference call to the MD. I’m asking not ecause I have to learn it but because I might want to. Current research group is on Teams but someone mentioned Slack and I wondered which might be better, or neither if an alternative does the job. We had sharepoint way back when I were a lad, not sure if that’s the same or free? I think a lot of issues over such products aren’t the tech but the attitude towards their use. Personally I’d talk to people if they were within walking distance but this would be for students.

  17. nice work not-Greg and great to see Castledine holding a proper trophy aloft at last, hope he does the same for me one day. That was an amazing double save from Cech late on. Surprised you were at 3 bar attacking right at the death in a cup final, I would have been at 2 or probably 1 at that stage

    Turf – we use Slack at work but also Confluence and One Drive for very similar purposes, basically live chat and research between departments on a variety of topics. Surprised both by the range of products for such simple solutions and by the valuations of the companies that provide them

  18. Cheers Abbeyhill – yes, I have wondered if they keep inventing things that ultimately fulfil one basic function, and ultimately you can’t force students to use it. I’ve seen a noble effort from the person who set up the sport research Teams group but only 3 people have even responded. I think I’d actually phone or email myself if I had a problem, other than that I’m not sure I’d communicate.

    I’ve given up on Colchester in FM. I was 8th and the board were delighted but I was in that stuck position of losing 250k per month, no saleable assets and every request for investment in wages or transfers declined. Basically I could only lose players from where I was at, something inherent in the game as I’d never spent a penny on fees. I could have tried to get promotion and see if I’d earn enough to progress the club but given the ridiculous result sequences I decided to restart from whatever very bottom club I was given. Stranraer. That hotbed of football.

  19. Chris99 – I just Binged that Vivaldi browser, having never heard of it until now. I love trying out new browsers, the more obscure the better. Lynx being of course the most memorable. Of course ‘these days’ we all want synced bookmarks and passwords across devices so I’ve been in the Firefox/Chrome space for years now (with occasional dabbles in Opera), so I doubt anything will get me away from it now.

    abbeyhill – Casteldine is going to retire one of these seasons and I was pretty desperate to see him lift something – anything – and knowing that the two European competitions, at least, have physical trophies at the end of them, really focused the mind.

    3/5 on the ATT/DEF is my preferred level at the end of a match where I need to keep the AI away from my goal area as much as possible. 1/5 or 2/5 put my team into the typical posture adopted by teams playing Man City this season, and we all know what happens there. Sooner or later, someone wriggles through, and I find myself punished more often than not when the AI has momentum, as Fulham had for nearly all of that final after I went 2-0 up. So my aim is to keep the ball higher up the pitch, win corners, etc. The full match highlights would have shown me doing this game management. Every time the AI got the ball it had that ‘AI that we need’ danger feeling to it.

  20. Somebody uses Bing?

  21. Fucking hell….I was in cex this afternoon and after trading rdr2 and buying the latest just cause game I had a couple of quid in vouchers…and they had a game for a couple of quid. The not even remembered by me pes 2017. And I couldn’t help myself. I’m guessing it was light on fouls, heavy on speed, low on individuality as per everything the last five years. Not as bad as 2016, nor good as 2018? Fuckety fuck, why do I keep putting myself through this bollocks hoping for a different outcome. If I get beyond four seasons in a single career it would be a miracle. I won’t.

  22. Chris99 – I just did a Lycos search and yes, it seems they do.

    Uncle Turf – my end of year PES2017 review features a few goals and some musings that sound very familiar. I was most offended by the slide-tackle that year, which I remember you also condemning with a cricketing term I’ve forgotten that describes when a fielder slides in front of a ball to stop it with his body. The forums are currently just coming down from a recent PES2017 craze where they said it was the best ever. I think I’m playing the best PS4 PES right now.

  23. Ah yes, The long barrier. I thought 2016 was the year of the awful slide, just shows how they’ve merged into one bucket of slop. My problem is I just can’t settle with FIFA, there is just something missing despite the better graphics, commentary, intelligence, options, presentation, etc etc etc.

  24. Turf – we use Slack, Skype and MS Teams here, MS teams is the best. full interaction and crossover with office 365, sharepoint etc.

    Still have PES 2017 on the PS4 in the cinema room, great game but way too easy. That was the year of back to back to back Trebles (F*ck you Man City).

  25. Uncle Turf – yes, a bit like PES6, PES2017 is a good game but buckles to the player very easily, and you can have any squad you want. It’ll serve you very well for a couple of seasons though, and you might consider a House Rules ML that limits all player OPRs to <80, say, similar to my summertime St Etienne adventure of that year, which was hugely enjoyable and where I never won anything. PES with lesser/young players is PES.

  26. Or I could aim to beat Paul’s treble record with a quad. An invincibles perhaps? Whatever, it’s not being fired up just yet asim very happy with Stranraer’s fm start. Sensible results, solid team building.

  27. adam very happy too, I understand.

  28. Haha. if you want a decently good older PES game Turf then 2017 isn’t a bad choice, if you’re ok with the arcade like speed, and less than difficult nature of it.
    Worth a punt if you want to try to set yourself goals and achieve them like you mentioned Turf.

  29. right up your street Turf:

  30. Very droll NG….bloody iPad auto fill thing.

    Paul – after many failed efforts I’ve concluded that cricket, like formula 1, is just not a sport that can be handled well by a console arcade format. I can’t imagine even playing 2020 matches as after a few overs the impulse to whack everything is too strong. If you actually succeed in doing so the stats are then ridiculous. In a similar vein who could be arsed driving round a track for 70 laps, two at full pelt is my limit. Don bradman was in cex when I opted for 2017, 6 quid – not worth the heartache.

    There are probably others you could put in there but I’m surprised they haven’t tried bringing back the boxing games. I quite liked training up a customised margin hagler type.

  31. Turf – totally agree and I have tried many times with the cricket games over the years but they just don’t transfer over to the video game market. I was tempted but I know exactly what would happen and it would be traded back in months. Not playing owt at the moment as a bad spell of hay fever means I can’t be bothered with anything.

  32. I am converted. Due to the lack of motivation to play any games following the bad Hay Fever reaction, I thought I would watch a film instead. Tbe misses went to bed after watching her GOT and I looked for something light hearted to watch. I then came accross Ted. I have had a bad history with the film and have aborted it each time within half an hour. For the first time I watched it alone and loved it. The film operates on so many levels and could easy watch it again. Yes I have found Ted.

  33. Darryl – You owe it to yourself to go find the directors cut version of TED 2 which is beyond hilarious !

  34. Darryl – can confirm, Ted 2 takes the essence of the first and develops it, improving and refining the meta-levels of the premise in so many directions. One of the most pure comedic ideas ever had, right up there with the likes of Airplane! for me.

  35. Has to be the directors cut though, many added scenes you don’t get in the normal version.

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