Fanfare for the common man
Dropping into the relegation zone in my first season in the top division is unprecedented. Traditionally in a PES game, I finish around mid-table in my first top-flight campaign, sometimes higher.
So this precipitous drop into the bottom three is worrying. And a wee bit embarrassing.
This year, I’m writing a daily blog about my adventures in PESland. This year, internet forums are packed to the rafters with people complaining that PES2008 is too easy; that they can win 8-0 on Top Player without any effort; that they have won everything there is to win in Master League with the Default squad, with one or both hands tied behind their backs, whilst blindfolded…
It’s enough to make a man feel inadequate.
But I never started this blog in order to showcase my magnificent skillz on the game. Those skillz don’t really exist. They never have done. I am an average player. Sometimes I can be great. Sometimes terrible. But most often, just plain average.
If the über-players’ accounts are to be believed, I’m fortunate to be in this position. The average player is actually better off. I still have something to play for, and will most likely always have something to play for.
Enough with the editorialising. I’ve got Coventry City into trouble, and the matches aren’t going to play themselves…
After seeing off River Plate in the D1 Cup and sailing through to the semis in style, it was back to the grind of the league. I was 18th – bad - but still within three points of several teams above me – good. The safety of mid-table was only a few wins away. There were loads of games left in the season. No real need to worry. Right?
Right. In the next four games I won two and drew two. I was out of that relegation zone and breathing slightly easier. Shaw got me a good goal in a key match, threading a needle with aplomb:
That was the winning goal in a six-pointer against Fenerbahce. The air was soundly punched at the end of that game, believe me.
Then something happened to me. Or something happened within the bowels of the game. Or both. The CPU went medieval on my ass.
My relegation rivals West Ham thumped me 4-0 at home in a game where I almost literally could not string two passes together. My team was not even fatigued. I had most of the First XI regulars on the field.
Then I came up against Newcastle. I was afraid. Licensed teams and/or players always seem to have an extra bit of CPU magic in their boots.
They scored early and created chances galore afterward. I could hardly get the ball. When I had the ball, I couldn’t keep it. The frustration built up and up… I was seething, and even hissing a little every now and then, like a pressure cooker. I had a player unjustly sent off – it was a timid clip in midfield that wouldn’t even be a yellow card offence in the real-life game. I completely lost my discipline and had a further three players sent off.
After the fourth sending-off I felt like deliberately getting a fifth player sent off and forfeiting the game (just get it over with), but the score then was ‘only’ 2-0. A forfeited game is counted as a 3-0 defeat. It would be better for me to try to hang on. Things might go down to goal difference in the final reckoning.
I reorganised – three at the back, two in midfield, one up front – and tried to hang on to the ball, and keep the score at 2-0. It was midway through the second half. I fancied my chances. And then Michael Owen got Newcastle’s third goal with almost the final kick of the game. 3-0.
Those were two disastrous games, but I’m still just outside the relegation zone. There are plenty of games left in the season. I think I should avoid the drop back into Division 2. But I’ll have to start getting results soon. I keep thinking: How did I let this happen?
When I moved back to Kansas and started supporting the Wizards (Kansas...
Can you post a text-based table at this point? How many points are you away from safety?
It sounds like it’s time to shore up the defense by any means necessary.
ck – I played the above games yesterday morning and was too pissed off with everything to bother getting my phone out, sitting up, leaning closer to the screen, zooming in, and then keeping my hand steady whilst pressing CAPTURE. I was VILE at work all day after that session!
I had a session last night when I was a lot calmer. I did take a screenshot of the table from just a few games afterward that I’ll be posting up next time or the time after. (Got a Cup run to post about as well.)
From next season (whichever Division I’m in) I’m planning to add an extra textbox or two to the sidebar, and a regular text-based snapshot of the table could be among them. I don’t want anything to interfere with my playing of the game, though, so if it takes too long I’ll probably just stick with regular mobile phone screenshots.
You know, when I get like that, it’s always good to go out into the world and touch base with more important things — for me, that includes my wife, my friends, good food, little kids, what have you.
When I first started getting in to PES, Emily (my fair lady-wife) would say, “I don’t understand why you play this game, because you only seem to get frustrated and pent-up about it.”
My friend Lars insists that football itself is negative entertainment — that we love football because ultimately, it’s about not getting what you want, failure and loss punctuated by really bright shining moments of ultimately false* hope.
*Unless you support Man. U, Arsenal or Chelsea (sorry, Liverpool), in which case, you are a dick-riding bandwagoner who doesn’t get that real football, like life, is about entropy.
Im up to division 1 and in the close season I decided to keep the majority of my players the same, bringing in 1 new attacker, 2 midfielders and 2 CLASS defenders. I got Ferdinand for 15k (hes at his peak and only goes down which sucks, but hey, i was rich, and maybe someone will buy him next season) and some young buck who will end up being fantastic…
I beat the world selection 2-0 in a 5min game – that was about 2450 points in the bank, woohoo (i hate those close-season games – i only ever pick the best teams to play against for the cash)…
If you’re struggling this year, and your negotiations go THAT bad everytime because of your team rating, like i said before, maybe relegation is for you lol. in reality this means losing tonnes of cash, but this is PES, and winning everything in the Div2 is as good as winning everything in the top league (nearly).
If you were to stay up, as youre hoping, what is your plan? Keep developing talent and wait to profit? Hoping to see those player stats soon, i swear Bramble cant be as good a choice as Kompany for example! (i havent checked bramble, maybe hes a rock)…
ck – It was a terrible hour or two after this batch of games. My mood wouldn’t lift. Kept thinking: What has happened to me in PES? And: Why, of all years, did I choose *this* year to start blogging about it?! And: It’s only a matter of time before some kindly citizen of the internet pops up to say something like *Face it dude u suck lol*. Grrrr. So it went for an hour or so, as I said. Then I started feeling cheerful. It’s a *game*, and I’m being challenged by it in a way I never have been before. Yes, some people (most people?) don’t find it particularly challenging, but I do. Who is getting the better value for money here?!
David – Bramble seemed great when I first got him but is now slowly getting worse in my eyes. I’m on the verge of ripping my team apart – alas, I’ve already played the games you’re currently reading about, so all of this great advice that you and others have been giving me won’t be implemented for a while. I stubbornly persisted with my weak AMF duo of Shaw and Shimizu, for example. At the end of this season, whatever else happens, changes are coming to my team.
A shakeup is in the works at Ricoh!
I get really worked up myself at times, especially when the scripting gets really evident. I swear outload. Very heavy stuff sometimes, and the missus always gives me a lecture.
I would stick with Shaw if I were you. Shimizu’s always been a promise never to be fulfilled. He’s just too puny. Get someone else like Yamada (great body balance) or Khumalo (develops very early to over 90 overall). Or you can get less talented but good bulkier stronger players like Diogo Rincon from Dynamo Kiev or Tadei from Roma or Lincoln from Schalke 04. They shouldn’t be hard to get.